Miracles

2011. I had just gotten married and instead of newlywed bliss, I was more anxious than I had ever been in my life. I told myself it was just the transition that was causing these anxious feelings, these bizarre symptoms, these thoughts of hopelessness. I kept thinking that one day I would wake up andContinue reading “Miracles”

My Factors

So, you really don’t need a “why” to feel anxious. I’ve struggled with that idea sometimes because as an analytical person I always want to know the reasons behind what I’m feeling, but I also know that sometimes searching for the “why” can add even more stress to whatever you’re feeling, especially when it’s notContinue reading “My Factors”

The Fox Who Survived

It was early morning, around 6am, on a cold, winter day. I was up watching the sun rise over our farm, savoring my coffee, my toes snuggled into cozy slippers, feeling peaceful and enjoying the view when I saw him. A fox appeared by the large evergreen trees to the right of our property. AtContinue reading “The Fox Who Survived”

Message over Discomfort

I’ve mentioned this before, but anxiety, for years, has been an incredible source of shame for me. It was my silent struggle, the thing that made me feel weak, not good enough, deeply flawed. I so wanted to appear confident, unafraid, capable and just normal. My struggle with anxiety, often debilitating anxiety, was my deep,Continue reading “Message over Discomfort”

The Diagnosis

F41.1. GAD, or, Generalized Anxiety Disorder. It’s a helpful code for medical professionals, for insurance companies, maybe for Therapists. It’s not the most helpful code for the person being diagnosed. At least it wasn’t for me. When my anxiety got really bad, right after my wedding, I remember telling the Doctor that I thought itContinue reading “The Diagnosis”

The Weird Symptoms

Heart racing, dizziness, sweaty palms, nausea, heightened senses, feeling like you’re losing your mind or about to die – unpleasant to say the least, but these are some of the symptoms that most people think of when they think of anxiety. The more “common” ones, if you will. That’s not to say that they don’tContinue reading “The Weird Symptoms”

The Powerful “I Can’t”

I say the words, “I can’t” far too often. Even if I don’t always voice them out loud I certainly think them plenty. Whenever I watch TV shows or movies with a survivalist theme I am the first one to think/say, “I would die,” or, “I could never,” or just, “Nope.” It’s actually become aContinue reading “The Powerful “I Can’t””

Double Footed Landings

I used to be a figure skater. Actually, a pretty good one. I started in Thailand, of all places, in the heat of the tropics. Sometimes the rink would have an inch of water on top of the ice but it didn’t matter because I loved skating more than anything. I had a Russian coachContinue reading “Double Footed Landings”

Maggie

I have a dog. Her name is Maggie. I also have a dog named Molly, but this post is solely about Maggie, and you’ll soon see why. A little bit about Maggie. She’s a beagle mix. She’s a rescue from Alabama. She’s nine years old. She’s brown and white and has little speckled spots onContinue reading “Maggie”

The “Right” to Feel Anxious

I grew up pretty well. Sure, there was some stuff. But, I had two stable parents who loved me unconditionally and provided for me. I had a roof over my head and food to eat. We weren’t wealthy, but we always had enough. I wasn’t abused. I had a pretty happy childhood. Like I said,Continue reading “The “Right” to Feel Anxious”